Machine!

Written by Steve Yenchik and Matt Heitz
(with profuse apologies for late attribution)

Cho:
(Machine) Snails Toes, chicken's fleas.
(Machine) Can I have a dollar please?
(Machine) Lizard's bacon, custard pie.
(Machine) Drove my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry.

And now for a disclaimer:
This song has no point, It's not going anywhere.
And if I had a hammer, I'd throw it in the air.
And feed it to Orangutans, Crocodiles, and Giraffes.
But not the Boa Constrictors; they couldn't swallow that.

For they live in the reptile house, you see,
And as far as it is known to me,
After studying them for quite awhile,
It's impossible for... the afformentioned reptile
To do.

cho:

Snakes have no rhythm, That's why they have so many kids,
And if I had a hammer, I'd give them all some limbs,
It's a simple life they lead, eating fish and chopping wood.
Their tails grow back if they fall off, I certainly wish mine would.

But what does mankind truly desire, 
but cook on the wood and wallow in the fire
Mikey likes it; he likes his life.
The farmer stands alone, The cheese takes a wife.

cho:

Brents's Elocution:
(Cannot, in all fairness, be reproduced in print.  It is inexplicable) 

cho:
(with the ALL MEN'S CHORUS!)

one two three kick!
Josh's speech:
This is it folks, this is the machine you've all been waiting for.
See it, running down the field, destroying everything in is path!  It's
a wachine machine; it's a drying machine, it's a refridgemator,
it's a simple lever, it's a pulley; it's got an IMA of 9!  
My god, folks, can you believe it?  Can you believe this machine?
This is technology in motion. This is machine!

machine.
machine.
machine.
machine.